Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
My boss' voice literally gives me gas
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
My favorite part about you getting arrested is having to explain the prosthetic leg in the front seat.
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
He called his prostate his "boner button".
He doesn't belong with God. He belongs face-down in a pile of his own excrement, vomit, blood and semen. Then pissed on by Satan.
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
If my birthday doesn't end with my panties hanging from a ceiling fan, I'm holding you responsible.
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
Randomize