Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
I'm about two and a half drinks away from gay.
I'm coming over.
she was carrying the quesadilla around the bar like a security blanket
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
Chances are I'll be there for your wedding. Camelbaks filled with jack and coke are appropriate attire, right?
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
And I was chasing apple pie moonshine (provided by cops) with bud light limeys. In a golf cart, wearing a tiara.
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
So uh. Your future in porn. Would you be willing to wear an alien costume for it?
Randomize
