yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all.
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
I feel like the devil slapped me in the face with his dick.
Birthday success
Dying on my bathroom floor at 7 am, I would rather be eaten by a shark right now
I woke up still drunk to a beautiful tattooed columbian man making me pancakes. How's your memorial day?
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
Randomize
