i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
there is an extreme lack of margarita in my mouth.
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
I don't want my vagina anymore.
Had dinner with a married woman but didn't have sex with her. Tweeted at Mike Pence to apologize anyway.
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