All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
The remote chance that I may get a blowjob is about the only reason I have a shower every day.
She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all.
i've learned that i'm good at stealing things. like live cats.
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
After an hour of searching for my pants, we had three people looking. They were finally found in the oven.
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
My husband is waiting until son is napping and air humps as a seduction tactic. Pray for me.
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