yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
Dude i just want you to know that when i found you half your mustache was already gone. I didn't do it.
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
Where would I incorporate "your boyfriend fucked the shit out of me last night" before or after Merry Christmas bitch?
My boss just sent an employee on an hour long paid break to pick up weed for our 'staff meeting' tomorrow morning.
I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
It's like everything I need in life within a five block radius: booze, toilets, dogs, dicks.
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
It's a testament to the kinds of spouses/parents we will be that we get so wasted but still show up to every class on time. We honor our commitments bitches!
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