okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
He blended the pizza with water and drank the whole thing. He is my hangover hero
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
Hey! Happy Birthday! Could you do me a favor and bring my underwear to the bar?
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
Randomize
