it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
My worst case scenario tonight is that I fuck a hot Swiss girl. Let that give you perspective on my life at the moment.
I didn't just randomly come up with it. But if you want to give me extra credit for creativity I have a bare chest and chocolate sauce left
Can I just say that you're probably one of my favorite people to have sex with and then eat hummus with at 3:45am?
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
He told me he felt like he was just pistol-whipped by Testicle Man.
I taught a straight girl about grindr today. She showed me tinder. It was like some sexual cultural exchange program
Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job
I'm in Home Depot and I can feel the straight bob the builders staring at me. I bet it's like I have a rainbow arrow pointing at me.
my roomie eats chipotle far too often. when i was looking for a bag to throw up in I had my choice of a wlamart bag and 10 chipotle bags
never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my vagina is on fire.
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