Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
woke up this morning with "hah" written on my penis.i was like wtf?? morning wood kicked in and found out what it really said, haNNah.then i remembered.
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
85% positive I just found a hair of a certain variety wayyy in the back of my mouth between two teeth while flossing.
Its really bad when you fall asleep at a stop light outside the hotel and you wake up to a small spanish limo driver knocking on your window to tell you it's a green light
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
Unfortunately i'm awake, hungover, and covered in something I'm pretty sure is Easy Cheese. Send help.
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
Guys I ate pizza off the fucking ground of the cab. I am the worst type of person
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
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