Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
life lesson #1: a fart during an awkward silence between 2 strangers doesnt make it less awkward.
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
While eating post sex burritos I dripped taco bell sauce on my boob. He licked it off and asked why I hadn't thought of that before.
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
Have a booty call at 3am, stopped for tacos at 2:30. It's 2:55 and I still haven't ordered but can't jump the curb to get out of line because there is a cop in front of me. What am I doing with my life?
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
Randomize
