Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
Best feeling in the world? holding your pee all day for a negative preggo test
: am i supposed to send the mass text 'merry christmas!' to my booty calls too?
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
Dude I asked him to get me beef jerky at 4 am and he actually walked to CVS to get it. CVS closes at 12 but it was the perfect opp to dip out
Nothing says "I'm sorry for shitting in your bed" like an Olive Garden gift card
i think i just lost a toe
as a side note pls kill me
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