Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
And then he proceeded to take my heartbeat, because apparently that tells him whether I was faking or not...
Just fell asleep during a bikini wax. Thank god for day drinking.
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
Can you come pick me up and take me to breakfast then the police station?
Where's your car?
The girl I brought home apparently stole it
I slept naked with a towel wrapped around my waist in case I pissed the bed again
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
No we didn't talk. I was high and doing naked yoga in the living room when she walked in so it was just awkward. I didn't even know my dad had a girlfriend.
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
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