gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
the quote on the bathroom wall was "stop reading this and focus on peeing" and i realized i'd peed on the seat.
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
I thought he was being really sweet and protective when he pulled me away from the guy i was hooking up with, but turns out he just wanted me to get chicken nuggets with him...
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
A toast to whoever set this year's daylight savings fallback to the day after halloween, granting us another hour to detox before we pretend to be functional adults. Clearly, a partier with forethought and clear priorities. Cheers!
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
Randomize
