I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
Dude, you sent that text at 9:44 AM. Who thinks of drugs that early?
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
Right. Will do. I'll call you if I need a ride. (that is a double meaning, go with it.)
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
Randomize