and next time when you feel me up, do it right
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
I woke up surrounded by goldfish. Thank God my laptop was here too. Now I don't have to leave my bed all day.
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
if you didn't cry because you couldn't find me and then pee your bed, your wingman status would totally be revoked for leaving me at that party.
How is it that I can make it to my 8am Friday morning still drunk after passing out the night before...but not to my 9am on Tuesday that I went to bed early for? Irony or karma?
ill drive you to the airport today if we can have sex first
i left yesterday
ill pick you up from the airport on sunday if we can have sex after
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
Randomize
