Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
Before he took off his pants he paused and said, "Remember..sometimes great things come in small packages."
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
it took me 20 minutes to get her upstairs... she crawled under a car and wouldn't come out.
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
I'm gonna be a few minutes late, some asshole just fell off the ferry so we had to stop.
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
It’s a dick. Seen one, seen em all. Unless it spews a fountain of tequila, I don’t need to see yours.
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Randomize
