That's intense
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time
And when he pulled me off the bathroom floor, he just looked at the cat litter stuck to my chin and said "oh sweetie" and shook his head. I think my dad's officially given up hope.
Just saw two dudes run across the street carrying a mini keg and a scaled model of the empire state building. Missed this town
It was the textbook our-balls-touched-while-engaged-in-a-threesome-with-our-bosses-wife conversation.
It amazes and alarms me I'm not shocked to read that.
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
You took a selfie with my hard dick and sent it to Scott with the caption 'Toldja'. It was hard to forget you're a teenager after that
I just saw a raccoon get launched out of a tree by another raccoon. They have turf wars...
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
Now swiping left on 23-year-olds with abs. Is this adulting?
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
Randomize
