I want to get laid tonight but my sheets haven't been washed since vomiting in them on Halloween :(
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
I was sitting on the floor of CVS chugging white grape juice until someone asked me to leave.
I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
Things I Learned Tonight: I have no future in goat wrangling. Herding. Whatever you call the ridiculosity that just transpired.
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
I came twice and when I was done I petted his head and said "you did good kid you did good" and just laid back smiling. Tell me I'm not awesome.
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
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