I felt like helen keller
But she could have totally found that shit before me
The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
WHERE ARE MY FUCKING EYEBROWS?!
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
Nooo. I was entirely happy pretending that my vagina only existed for peeing and releasing Satan's waterfall.
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
You had sex with a kid to spare him the shame of being a virgin. Evidence is on my side.
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
He has the fingertips of a God
Randomize
