my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
His ankle bracelet only gets in the way when I'm trying to take off his pants.
there was a sad and surprising lack of "did strippers and blow" in that sentence
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
I told you when I started the only reason I was gonna coach your kids soccer team was that I could meet all the hot soccer moms. So why are you so mad I slept with your ex?
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
How high were you when you left that message, cause you made honest-to-God, credible seal noises.
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
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