I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
You tipped the bathroom lady $20 and then yelled "IT'S YOUR LUCKY DAAAAAAAY" at her.
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
I knew I was high when I wanted to write a poem about how great it felt to wash my face
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
the cop asked if i was drunk and i responded with "breathalize me, cap'n". incidentally, he was a captain and i blew a .13.
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
Randomize
