You stressed the importance of not breaking the seal too early... and then proceeded to piss your pants when you sneezed.
While drunk it seemed like a good idea to barricade my roommate in his room with everything that we could move in our apartment, waking up to him screaming from it collapsing on top of him was just an added bonus.
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
Coffee's working. Just killed a fly with my bare hands.\nFuck with me.
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
Randomize
