I woke up with semen in my invisalign. My molars were just marinating in it
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
Dontating $10 to the Red Cross relief effort in Japan for every car bomb I take tomorrow. Yes, buying me a drink just became a good cause.
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
Ryan got so drunk he gave a hobo $20 and I had to zip tie him to the bed so he doesn't out stupid himself
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
Today, my weed came in a pokéball. I officially love my dealer.
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
I woke up in the middle of the night on all fours turning circles in my bed! No more patron for me!
Randomize
