I'm eating lunch next to a table of beautiful culturally-diverse women chattering away happily. It's like sitting next to a Yaz commercial.
aaaannd alcoholism beats pride. it's like grown-up rock, paper, scissors
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
I just saw a bunch of drunk old guys riding on the side of a modified old fire truck yelling at cars and smoking while they looked for parking...promise we will be just like them when we grow up?
I'm craigslisting fire trucks as we speak
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
You know shits really hit the fan when you start using public bathroom air freshener spray as perfume
what? where are you?
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
Randomize
