I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
i wanna have a kid now so by the time he's 20 ill only be 42 and assuming im already divorced we can pick up girls together
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
To be so small, the mini-horses are exceptionally aggressive. And fast. Very, very fast.
Abort! Abort! He almost bit off a finger!
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
Guess who figured out you can fit an entire bottle of champagne in a big Subway cup. Open container laws my ass.
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
I'm sitting on your porch drinking wine from the bottle. Just so your new neighbors know what kind of people are in the neighborhood
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
I woke up with a captain's hat on my desk.
The waitress at the Denny's in usa remembered me from 2 years ago when we went at 4 in the morning plastered, wearing overalls and huge inflatable corona hats on our heads
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
Randomize
