Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
Next time a random bus filled with santas pulls up to the bar, I'm not getting on it.
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
Randomize
