i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
I was just told by a cop that my party was the most epic party they ever crashed
Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
i got kicked out of McDonald's for demanding a margarita mcflurry
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
It was like Lady and the Tramp, but just tramp and the tramp. And instead of spaghetti and meatballs, we had whiskey and cups
I just learned that the grill marks on a Burger King burger patty are actually previously burnt on there with a radioactive spray-on liquid and McDonald's french fries are actually 5% potato.
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