I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
For the record, rock bottom is where you start crying during porn because your ex used to slap your ass like that.. Continue on with your day now.
I woke up to my roommate checking my pulse
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
Randomize
