I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
like a dude with a badge in a golf cart is gunna do shit. Unless he has a tazer. Then it's fair game.
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
Randomize
