u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
oh, also, we're locked out of the house and we're going to have to take shelter with the hot, poss single, dad next door. i hope this turns into a porno
I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
You dont lie about slip and slides
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
I mean, you've seen me eat pizza, sober, out of a garbage can, and yet I refuse to go eat at that place. Just sayin....
My apartment looks like the apocalypse of sobriety.
Then you guys just all showered together...?
Come by so you can take a pregnancy test with me. It's like my monthly ritual!
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
Randomize