All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
She called me Spock and proceeded to ask me to 'teach her the ways of the force'. I just couldn't do it after that. No way am I fucking a girl who can't tell the difference between Star Wars and Star Trek.
You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
There should be a blender full of rum, tea, and grape jelly in the freezer. She thought it was a good idea until she blew chunks.
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
No need to call an exterminator, the ants overdosed on the leftover lines on the counter.
You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress".
If we can only get laid once in a blue moon, apparently this will be our month.
If you've ever wondered what a shitshow is, just watch me at the bar on a Friday. Or Tuesday. Take your pick.
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
Randomize
