So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
After skinny dipping in your pond, I think me and tequila have added a whole new dynamic to our relationship.
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
Honey, I don't care how "classic you" this is. It's not gonna matter if we can't find you in the morning.
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
Like, actually questioning if you ate dog shit last night
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
"my nose is broken but I'm beer pong champ so it evens out really"
Damn victory sex feels great
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
Randomize
