Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
The security guard told you that the room was off limits and you just looked at him and said,"Its okay, I have a beard".
omg i hate the new neighbors. why cant a bitch just be hungover in peace on a wednesday morning.
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
Omg have I shown you my skeezy ex fiancée?
The other one.
Why is there an inflatable flamingo in the backseat of my car?
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
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