ugh.. my birth control just came out of my nose. wtf?
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
Your girlfriend is in jail- I've just never been able to use that in a sentence before. Thank you both!
You insisted we help some homeless guy put up posters for his missing pet alligator so we left you there because they were really just Chinese takeout menus.
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
Tip of the day: Don't Amazon vibrators when your WHOLE FAMILY uses your prime account. There's dildo after dildo showing up in my "Related to Items You've Viewed" category on the home page.
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
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