how can u be prego again
We need to find a way to make penises more like hookahs.
I think the secretary can hear it when I fart in the bathroom, how do you think she feels about that?
Apparently the last thing they remember of me was me stumbing into a bathroom, then falling out 5 minutes later clutching a butter knife repeating "ketamine goes in my face hole"
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
I think it's time for tequila and I to go our separate ways
You're lucky I just like fucking you because you would really suck at being a boyfriend.
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
Randomize
