i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
i seriously haven't spoken to him since i drunk dialed him and told him i loved his beard
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
Got to use the phrase "sweet pukas dude." My day is made.
He texts me "just to say hi" and then tells me how hard he is and sends me a dick pic. And I'm like, dude, I'm ordering a burrito right now
Now you can NEVER tell anyone that on thanksgiving I took a selfie of my pussy to prove they don't get worse with babies.
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
Listen, i know this is weird for you, but as your fuck buddy, id prefer if you didnt fuck her.
Youre asking too much from me
Randomize
