i just took a sip of diet coke and i said " as soon as it hits my lips i wanna smoke a cig." then i thought of your dick.
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
Dude you asked your tattoo if it wanted to go swimming
So the TSA can feel me inside and out in front of 40 people, but they catch me fucking in the bathroom 20 feet away and all of a sudden their the decency police
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
So my best friends wedding ended with everyone seeing me getting eaten out behind the forbes church. Classy!
Randomize
