I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
He picked me up from the airport wearing nothing but a trench coat and a bow on his dick
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
Her husband thinks she's banging me and nothing is going to change his mind so I told her we might as well just bang and make him right
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
He woke me up at 6:30 to have sex again and afterwards, he didn't even judge me when I asked him if he wanted some rum. I think I found my soulmate.
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