Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
She showed up to the party with a live octopus and a 30 pack that was already half gone
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
There arew tilmes ina man's life when christmaas. THerew are times in a man's lfie when drunk texts from a bathrom hyufgirto. So, you know, merry chriastmans.
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
Randomize
