So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
Dan marino should def buy this ambulance. But not this one. I'm gonna fuck this ambulance up
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
Just had a threesome for the second time in my life. I don;t even enjoy threesomes. Too much effort.
HOW DO THESE THINGS KEEP HAPPENING TO YOU?
MASS TEXT: Next weekend I will be in town for St. Patty's day. There will be a bonfire and liqour olympics. We will have booze but in order to participate it is byob. Upon arrival everyone will be asked to sign a waiver. I am not responsible for liver failure, death, loss of clothing or memory, bites, scratches, hickies, pregnancies, or any other for of injury you may obtain while participating. There will be ridiculous amounts of green glitter, be prepared to puke it up. ALSO WEAR SOMETHING GREEN OR YOU WILL BE PENALIZED!! AUTOMATIC 5 SHOTS. HAPPY GAMING!!!
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
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