You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
I'm pretty sure she sent a group text out saying that I was the one to get with her last night and sorry to everyone who didnt make it.
Honestly it was an honor just to be nominated.
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
I think I've given more of my business cards to Chipotle trying to win free burritos than anyone else
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
This is seriously fucking awkward. My favorite sex scene just started and my dad's still here. He offered me Cheetos.
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
Randomize
