farters have to be the big spoon...
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
She just used a chaser for red wine.
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
So here's a brief summary of my weekend: last night I drank four glasses of Death Punch, grabbed the toaster, said "This is mine", put it in my pants and walked out the front door.
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
Probably some sort of karmic revenge for me looking at titties somewhere along the way
and for that you shall suffer
God: I won't strike you down, but I shall introduce your child to Doja Cat during a quarantine
Randomize
