Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
I feel like I spend my weeks apologizing for my weekends.
I got laid because I told her I play guitar. I haven't played in 7 years and only know a G chord. I love this place.
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
He made me a flamingo drink and now I don't know why things are the way they are.
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
what the fuck is wrong with you
Do you want me to go chronologically or alphabetically?
i need you to come over and tell me if you can notice that i'm only wearing a teddy underneath my trenchcoat
My boss couldn’t find her phone so she asked me to call it and when I found it the screen said Fuck Toy was calling. I’m very much okay with this
Randomize
