And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
The only reason why I invited him to my party was because he is suicidal.
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
Remember when you walked in on me sleeping INSIDE a pillowcase?
Do one night stands count towards my number?
Yes. A penis is a penis
Even bad ones?
YES.
I think I just figured out how to make weed tea in the coffeemaker.
Spoiler alert: my plans for Halloween are going to make our dealer's birthday look like a bunch of mormon ladies having a scrapbooking circle
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
Randomize
