Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
Girl behind me in line at CVS was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan B soon she might be a mom and that if we couldn't tell she'd be a horrible mom
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
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