she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
I think one day, after evolution kicks in, my sons will thank me for having a 3rd ball. That's how much sex I'm having.
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
in hindsight, the duct tape banana hammock was a bad idea.
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
Why was I drunk tweeting incorrect Beyonce lyrics last night?
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
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