her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
I'm stoned at 1030am, watching Maury with my exboyfriend. I need to make better choices with my life.
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
Randomize
