It's true. Ladies love me because I'm so strong and they feel safe. Not because of my pseudo charm and their impaired judgement after several drinks...
I swear I have "I love assholes" written on my forehead with ink that only guys can see.
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
I hated hipsters before it was mainstream.
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
I'm still not sure if it was intentional, but the chiropractor definitely cradled his balls on my shoulder. He even seemed to adjust the sack for comfort. I think I should be flattered. He is a doctor, after all..
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
That awkward moment when your boyfriend tries to have sex with his go pro on #hdporn
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
Randomize
