Kiss
Puke
yo dude i was totally schwabbin last night.
what does that even mean?
you ever see those charles schwabb commercials, where the people are like half cartoon half real.... well yeah i saw that in real life.
you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
When you gave the girl your number the fat girl was like "take mine....here please take mine"
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
Remember when we used to share painkillers at parties? Now we're dealing in blood pressure pills. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.
i mean, i offered you kinky, jungle themed sex. i don't know what else you want from me
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
Like when your most normal sex dream is you being a prostitute, you know it's been one long ass dry spell.
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
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