can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
It's one of those days where you order the free Papa John's pizza so the delivery guy can bring you Coke to go with your rum. The tip was more than the order.
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
Too bad pet owners lack respect for my training in ancient Buddhist and holistic rehab therapies.
I'm not sure the Buddhist consider pot brownies holistic rehab therapy
He follows more cats on Instagram then he does girls.. That's how you know your boyfriend is whipped.
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
idk what to be more embarrassed/confused about, that i lost my underwear or that i woke up covered in fried rice
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
Randomize
